I chose my apparel, I wore a beer barrel
And they rolled me to the very first row
I held a big sign that said, "Kiss me I'm a baker
And Monty I sure need the dough"
Then I grabbed that sucker by the throat until he called on me
'Cause my whole world lies waiting behind door number three

And I don't want what Jay's got on his table
Or the box Carol Merrill points to on the floor
No I'll hold out just as long as I am able
Or until I can unlock that lucky door
Well, she's no big deal to most folk
But she's everything to me
'Cause my whole world lies waiting behind door number three

Oh Monty, Monty, Monty, I am walkin' down your hall
Got beat, lost my seat, but I'm not a man to crawl
Though I didn't get rich, you son of a bitch
I'll be back just wait and see
'Cause my whole world lies waiting behind door number three
Yes my whole world lies waiting behind door number three