-- Spoken:
"Play Ball!! (one, two, three, four)"
"Where's my per diem? (Ladies and gentlemen, the Carl Reiner Band)"
"Hey Bobby, where's the keys to the rent-a-car?"
"Jimmy, Jimmy, can I open the show in Atlanta please?"
"Warning! Don't ever start a band!"

He worked hard all year, just wanted a few weeks alone
But his old lady's into modelin', she can't get away from a phone
Besides she bitches about the mosquitoes
She says, "Down there there is nothing to do"
Her goddamn phone never stops ringin'
He'll try the service in a day maybe two

Well he's on his third drink before the wheels of the plane leave the ground
Makin' points with the stewardess high over Long Island Sound
She's also spending some time on the island
Too much city madness gives her the blues
They make a date to go dancin' and dinin'
It seems neither has that much to lose

Chorus:
The weather is here I wish you were beautiful
My thoughts aren't too clear but don't run away
My girlfriend's a bore, my job is too dutiful
Hell nobody's perfect would you like to play?
I feel together today

Well now that's just the start of a well-deserved overdue binge
Meanwhile back in the city certain people are starting to cringe
His lawyers are calling his parents
His girlfriend doesn't know what to think
His partners are studying their options
He's just singin' and orderin' drinks

Chorus:
The weather is here I wish you were beautiful
The skies are too clear life's so easy today
The beer is too cold, the daiquiri's too fruitiful
No place like home when you're this far away
I don't care what they say (I don't care)

He's goin' back to New York pack it up and let everyone know
It was something that he should have done such a long time ago
Still time to start a new life in the palm trees
Ah, Billy Clyde wasn't insane
And if it doesn't work out there'll never be any doubt
That the pleasure was worth all the pain

Chorus:
The weather is here I wish you were beautiful
The skies are too clear life's so easy today
The beer is too cold, the daiquiri's too fruitiful
No place like home when you're this far away
Time for to play
I need time for to play
Time for to play
I need time for to play
I need time for to play
I need time for to play
I need time for to play
I need time for to play
I need time for to play

Billy Clyde Tuggel was a character in the soap opera "All My Children".